My eye

How weird to see my eye that up close from the side... But it actually turned out to be a cool picture, I think.

Here I am, yet another Sunday morning where I wasn't able to have a lie-in. I SO hoped to sleep until at least 10-11, but nooooo.... I woke up at the unholy hour; 8, with a blasted headache.  Please, give me a break. I am so tired, and I need to sleep for days, or so it feels like. 

We have summer temperatures here now, and yesterday was no exception. I had been out shopping some when I got a text message from Agnete. She asked would I come over and sunbathe with her, and so I did. It was insanely roasting on that veranda and garden! It was great to see Agnete! She is home visiting, since it's a Bank Holiday weekend. We had a good talk about loads of stuff. In the evening the two of us plus Møyfrid, another friend from our "gang", went to Janne. They had wine, we all had a fantastic warm salad that I hardly could stop eating, ice cream and fresh strawberries + more.  It was the sort of evening I sorely needed. I went home feeling happy and giddy. I love those girls!

Work practise is going better all the time. I had my first client all alone on Wednesday. I got a new case that I alone am responsible for you see. The first meeting went quite well. I know I could probaly have cut the meeting shorter, but the woman needed someone to talk to, so I let it go...

I am sorry, but I have nothing to write about. I am severly uninspired lately, and even though I think about stuff that annoy me, make me happy, excite me etc etc, I can't find it in me to sit down and write anything about it. How sad is that. I am extremely embarrassed by the way this blog has evolved. I think it is a tragedy. Where's the spunk? I want to, again, write things I can laugh at, be proud of, and be touched and affected by. Argh! Now it is like the biggest boring blog ever!! Somebody spank me! ;-)

Oh yes, If you haven't watched the BBC series "Planet Earth", DO! I got tears in my eyes from some scenes. Amazing! They took 6 years to make it, and it shows. It takes you to places rarely seen by mankind, and it makes you fall totally in love with this planet of ours. What a magnificent planet it is. 

I just want to say that I am very happy for all my blogfriends. I can't believe how great you are. Some day I hope to visit you all! I'd love that, for sure!!! 

It says Saturday on the heading, but that is because Iposted sometihng last night, and then edited now... So it is Sunday...

I'll go now, for some breakfast  EV :-)

BOB BOB BOB BOB...

Phew!

First of all:

CONGRATS to Rønnaug and her family on their beautiful girl, Karen, who was born on April 9th!!

CONGRATS to Moxie and her family on their gorgeous son; Casanova. He was born on April 11th!!

Bless them all!

Secondly:

Thanks guys for all your love and condolences regarding my granda. You are all enormously special to me, and I want to apologize for not being very active on your blogs lately. I hope you forgive me.

When I woke up this morning I said to myself; today you have two tasks. They are to clean this place and to write a blog entry. It’s been two weeks since my last one. So now I am sitting in front of my beloved (read computer) thinking of a beloved (read Bob), all whilst listening to Bargain, by The Who. Of course I chose to write first. I postpone the dreary stuff for later… But this time I actually look forward to the result; a sparkly and freshly smelling flat.

Two weeks since my granda died. The funeral was beautiful. We sat in the front row in church. When my tears started running, and I sniffled, I suddenly felt a hand in mine, it was my brother’s. He squeezed it, and we held hands all through the service. He is a gem! When the priest read my granda’s favourite psalm; oh boy did I cry! I nearly choked.  The first week after the funeral was absolute torture, and I spent it in Crycity and Numbville. I am back now though, and I am glad I spent a lot of time with family.

This last week has been brutally stressing at work practise. Yikes! And oh my God, 
I can’t believe that I only have 6 weeks left there. Time flies so fast right now that it isn’t funny anymore. It is going grand. I see a lot of terrible and heart breaking things. But I also see a lot of good work; people who care about the kids, and who tries to help these seemingly lost families.

Spring is here for real now. Last week we had beeeeutiful weather. The trees are starting to bloom, and I see green leaves when I look out my window. It is the most magnificent time of year, if you ask me. There’s life! At the same time spring also makes me feel a bit melancholic for some reason. Like I am remembered of all the things I should be, should do, should manage etc etc, and yet I am not. It is actually a bit sad… plus I still miss Bob. When is this going to end!? Luckily the pain isn’t as severe as it used to be, but the love, yes the love is still there. The deepest love I’ve ever felt for another human being. But I won’t “bore” you with more Bob stuff… Sometimes I just have to write a little bit about it all. Especially after a day like yesterday, where he was on my mind constantly.

But now I need some breakfast… And after that, I desperately need to organize this dump. *lol* it isn’t that bad, seriously, but nevertheless…

LOVE :-) 

In loving memory

Of my dear granda Trygve Bernhard who passed away quietly in their living room 
at 07.00 this morning.  He was 87.

I love you granda, and I know you are in a much better place right now. You will be greatly missed though, with all your wise words, quotes, history and knowledge. I am so thankful for the last 6 years, as you and I grew very very close... I could talk to you about anything. We could even discuss what kind of asses we liked best on women; we agreed on a good sized one! *lol* 

I know you loved and respected me for all that I am, and for 
that I am forever grateful. It was mutual... 

Take care on your new journey, and I'll see you when it's my time. 

A lot of love, and hugs 

EV - your grand daughter.  

Hmmm...

Take the Quiz here!

I'd love that, because then Mr Darcy would be my man. Yum!

And the on to a little survey that I stole from lovely and beautiful Martha's blog.

1. Cell phone: is with me at all times, and used like a gazillion times a day!
2. Relationship: Yes, I am in a totally HOT one with CSI at the mo…
3. My hair: just cut it, shortish and blonde
4. Work: I go to work practise every day
5. My sibling: is someone I love dearly, and whom I am emotionally very close to
6. My favourite thing: my computer, could not live a day without it
7. My dream last night: Oh, *blushing*. It was a so-called wet dream (or is it called that for women too!?) about Bob.
8. Favourite drink: water and tab X-tra
9. Dream car: BMW, a black one that looks like a panther ready to attack
10. The room I’m in: my spare bedroom, which I use for painting/homework/computer
11. My shoes: black adidas with three white stripes
12. My fears: drowning, never finding love again
13. What do I want to be in 10 years: a hard working woman who loves her job and has a fantastic man/woman in her life.
14. Who did I hang out with this weekend: No one really, except family.
15. What I am not good at: going to bed early, eating right, keeping a tidy flat
16. Muffin: yum yum
17. One of my wish list items: oh boy that list is waaay long
18. Where I grew up: at Vigrestad a small place in the south-west, where I still reside.
19. Last thing I did: talked to dad on the phone for 25 minutes. He lives 200 metres away and calls me…
20. Wearing: black trousers, black bra, and a green t-shirt
21. Not wearing: knickers *coughing and blushing*
22. My pet: is a hairy bastard cute fluffy slutty loveable cuddly kitten
23. My computer: is something I bought the hardware/software for, and my brother and I 
then built it.
24. My life: life? I have no life.
25. My mood: silly, sexy and mad
26. Missing: being able to run like the wind down a green meadow
27. What I am thinking about right now: William Petersen YUM! No triple yum!
28. My car: is still waiting to be bought sometime in the future
29. My kitchen: is nice enough, and actually tidy
30. My weather: blue sky and sun, mild
31. Favourite colour: depends on the mood, but green and red stand out
32. Last time I laughed: really hard? That was during Easter from talking to Helene and Rønnaug
33. Last time I cried: Sunday, because of my granda
34. School: is a very good thing
35. Love: is essential. It is something that I need in my life, in some form or another

sad post

This won’t be a long entry. But I thought that since it is almost three weeks since my last entry, it was in its place to write again.

I am very sad at the moment. My grandfather has cancer again, and this time it is a very aggressive form, in/around his gallbladder. His name is Trygve Bernhard, but people only use Trygve. I visited them last Monday, and when I saw him again today, almost a week later, it was like seeing two different persons. He had lost a lot of weight, and I felt his bones as I went to hug him to tell him I love him. He whispered back, love you too… It was terrible to see him so weak. He could hardly hold his cup of coffee. I could feel the knot in my throat grow and grow, but I stayed strong, for mam. When I went to the loo my tears started to run, but I managed to dry them off. I can’t start that crying engine, it will never stop. I am so close to my granda, and though he is old, I want him to be around much longer. I know we have to be happy for all the years he has been here… He is 87, and he hasn’t been sick a lot, and he hasn’t had much pain, his age considered. Granda said to my mum the other day; “well, we’re all going to lie in green fields and be happy, aren’t we?”… He has his faith, and this comforts me. I know he will get his peace, and I know he will look after me. I don’t mean to sound cynical, but in one way I hope he dies quickly, because he hates being so dependant, and then he won't be in so much pain. He hates the fact that his body reverses to almost infantry, and he can’t do anything to stop it…

There’s absolutely no dignity in his state right now, and you can see that it bothers him SOOO much! My mum agrees. His mind being clear and all. He has even driven a car 
up until now. God bless my granda. Love him! At times like this, I really feel that I am alone. Like living alone, having no one special in my life. I miss it, always, but especially now. But I am not going to make this about me… What about granma. She is going to lose her husband. Ah, I can’t think of it. I hate cancer, did I mention that!?!

Gosh, I’ve cried so much right now that my eyes are swollen to a state formerly unknown… I can hardly see truth be spoken. I am going to work tomorrow, but I just feel like going to granda and hold him all day. I can’t though. I am not tired, and there’s too much going on in my mind to be able to sleep right now. I guess one episode of CSI, season one will do the trick. I haven’t seen the first 7 seasons, as I never liked CSI before. So I’ve got a lot of catching up to do.

Other than that, life is numb. Nothing more to say. I miss laughing. Like uncontrollably laughing, so that I almost piss my knickers out…

EV

My voice message

Yup! My voicemessage to you. So sorry for my horrible sounding voice.
It sounds all fake for some reason. Can't explain it.
And my English is not the best either. I don't know what happened. 
I think I got all nervous recording.

MY MESSAGE IS HERE

I will be back with a proper post, sooooon...

HUGS!!

Music and more

Ah, how lovely! The sun is out today. The other day was the first time I had seen it in weeks, literally. If not for months. It might have shone through the clouds on a seldom occasion, but blue sky and a sun that one can see, have been rare the last 4 months. One long dreary rainy windy season! Autumn, that’s what we’ve had. Yuk. I am sick of it. One could become dark by less.

Yesterday I had a youtube kick. Watched a lot of clips, amongst them some of a musical called “Which Witch” by two Norwegian women called Benedicte Adrian and Ingrid Bjørnov. I absolutely LOVE it. I might have mentioned it before, but that is just how much I like it. It is a mix of rock and opera. Fabulous. I will give you a link to one of the songs that I found. It is not the best of them, but as I only found three I think this is the best of them. The song is called “Malleus Maleficarum”. (which is the Latin name for “ The Hammer of Witches”, which is a book that contains medieval treatises on witches and the persecution on them. It was written in 1486.) But first, here is a short plot synopsis of the musical:


Maria Vittoria, foster-daughter of an influential Roman family, has fallen in love with her German tutor, Daniel, recently made a bishop of the Catholic Church. Maria's foster-father wants to marry her off to a German merchant banker, but the headstrong Maria has other plans.

After causing a scandal at the Vatican the lovers are obliged to leave Rome. Daniel takes Maria back to his family home in Heidelberg where she meets Anna Regina, his possessive elder sister. The illicit love affair conflicts with Anna's ambitions for her brother's career, and when Daniel openly declares his commitment to Maria, Anna has to take action. Daniel mysteriously falls ill on the following day and remains in a deep sleep.

Anna Regina then accuses Maria of having cast a spell on Daniel. The townspeople turn on Maria and she is imprisoned for witchcraft… Oooh pray, what will happen!?

Now for the song: Malleus Maleficarum

This is from the show in London; Maria in the stocks


These two women started early playing around with this genre. They released a record/cd called "Rock VS Opera in 1985 that this song is from. 

Oh, I found one other clip now. Yay. This is a very early version of one of my favourite songs from the musical. Probably from early 90s. Looks like a video of it, as it isn’t form the musical itself; Eternally

Gee, I have to say that I am quite a wreck these days. So tired I feel I have no energy to do anything. Nor have I any imagination or creativity to write anything of interest to anyone. I sat on the train home yesterday, and tried to feel something. The only thing I felt was emptiness. Bare and numb, and my inside is still.

There is however a “nerdy guy” at work that is kinda cute. He is an economic counsellor for people who have problems with deep depths and stuff. He both looks and is your typical bachelor, and he wears vests/waistcoats.*giggle* Well, I don’t know what it is, but there’s something about him. Plus he is tall and slender and has a cute arse. *lol* I would never fall for him, but it is good to have a nice arse to look at when he walks down the corridors.

I must say sorry to all my blog friends for my complete and utter, and not to mention shameful absence on your blogs lately. I am so so sorry! I do read you, but like I said before; I am empty. Next Thursday I will get my Easter holiday, and I will be off for almost two weeks. I hope to rekindle my inner self then… I still love you, ok!

Hugs and stuff from me :-)

Hip behaving badly

Yeah right. *lol* Didn’t I say I was going to write before next weekend in my lat post? Well, as you all can see I didn’t… Sorry. It’s been a busy week. Like on Thursday I wasn’t home before at 8 o’clock pm. Left home at 07.15 am… 13 hours away. I was really tired. Tuesday I had visitors; Eva and her hubby Erling. So nice to see them. Eva is having an operation in her back coming Monday. Please keep her in your prayers. She has a prolapse that is tricky and practically killing her. Due to the location of the prolapse, they can’t guarantee that she’ll get all better. But let’s hope so!

As it said in the headline; my hip is behaving badly. Indeed-e-o… I just had to take a pill for the pain. So severe right now I can hardly sit still. I’ve had grave pains for many weeks now. It is so frustrating sometimes, to know that there is nothing to do about it. I have to live with it always like. The ache goes from my arse, and my hip area, and all the way down to my ankles. Sorry, I won’t whine any more about it.

Meanwhile, I am currently wondering whether most people in the surrounding areas got their drivers licenses in the post. There is an insane amount of bad driving out there. Like every time I’m out on the roads I am appalled by the way some people behave in the traffic. I think the lack
of consideration, politeness and some respect is revolting. I think ht the concept of “other people” means nothing. Not to mention the horrible cutting, speeding and overtaking… Yikes. I am surprised that more people aren’t killed around here, I really am.

I am in love with the county (Rogaland) in which I live in. I think it is a county full of breathtaking nature, and there is so much weather, so to speak. In addition, we have fjords and mountains, plus the flatness where I live, with open sea and sandy beaches. We can go from scenery like this…




... to this in quite short time. I think the diversity is fantastic!




I am off to watch some TV and eat ice cream 

Hugs EV :-)