Thinking...

I am bisexual, and sometimes I find the thought of that quite amusing. It was of course not amusing when I found out that I was bi.
I lived In Ireland at the time. One evening when going to bed I suddenly thought about a certain woman in a way I never had before. At first I thought that it was only her I could like this way. But then two years later I had to face reality. I was head over heels in love with a woman. This was actually serious.

The first time I thought about a girl that way was in 1994, and the final admittance came in 1996.

I had to face up to reality; I was bisexual. I could love both men and women.

I hated it. I detested myself for feeling it. But nothing helped...

Now, 10 years later, I have gotten used to it, and I am very comfortable with my own sexuality. I don't have any problems with being honest about it, and if people don't like me cause I am bi; Well feck off! It's like what the great Pete Townshend says: "Be kind, be real, or get the fuck out of my face" I couldn't agree more!

But one thing still makes me think though, about bisexuality. How weird is it that I can be attracted to something as different as a man and a woman? They are indeed poles apart, both physically and emotionally. And yet; I find both equally intriguing. It is hilarious actually. And to be honest; I don't get it! I do not understand how such a thing is possible, really I don't. But I am living it, so it must be true, eh?!?

I am soooo tired, and it is "only" 23.45, so I think I am gonna try to get to sleep before 2 o'clock in the morning for once.

Hopefully I will have more interesting things to write soon. I am sad at the moment. Heartache and grief you know.

Yaaawnnn - Monsoon ;-) "The boring" -